Fading Honeysuckle Foliage Giving Way to Plump Red Berries...
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
It needs to be done...I'm 40 now...can't put it off! I'm relieved the appointment is made.
Any words of wisdom?
Thursday, October 22, 2009
I heart Mary Janes Farm magazine!! One of the things I have found in the last few months are the Mary Janes Farm blogs. I started following the City FarmGirl Blog and the Rural FarmGirl Blog a few months ago and have really enjoyed them both. I have especially liked Rene's posts on the Rural Farmgirl Blog.
Then, yesterday, I found out that they have a new blog called Suburban Farmgirl Blog. I'm really excited about this one since that pretty much describes me right now. I'm looking forward to what Paula has to say...
Just thought I'd share!
Have a great Thursday.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
I can only guess that Travis felt Hopeless. Maybe Helpless. Sad. Depressed. There have to be many emotions that would lead you to that final day when you make the dreadful decision to end your own life. No Hope for something better.
I'm sad. Sad for him. Sad that he lost the Hope. Sad for my brother and the effect this, no doubt, will have on him.
I really didn't know him at all. Only met him a few times. But, he has been on my mind for the past seven days. I can't stop thinking about what would lead him to that decision. I always come back to Hope.
This event sort of landed in my backyard...so to speak...pretty close to home I mean. I have done a lot of thinking about my own Hope for the past week. For me, a Hope in something more didn't come naturally. I had to seek it out. I have experienced some ugly, life changing, events in my life. I've also experienced depression. I know the hopelessness you feel. I can almost see how you could head down that path Travis took that heartbreaking night. When there is no hope...what is the point?
Hope for me first came when I realized that I wasn't alone. I wasn't alone in my past experiences. I wasn't alone in what was feeling at the time. That was comforting in a way.
Then I found my true Hope. God. I didn't find God at church. I didn't have a conversion experience. I found God by crying out to Him and Hoping that there was something more. This something more raised a lot of questions for me. Questions I couldn't answer. Questions no one could really answer for me. That is when I made the Decision. The Decision to believe. I decided that believing in something unknown and unseen was better than the alternative. I now call it Faith. I now choose to believe there is a reason for my life and my experiences. That reason is something more. God's plan for me. At this point in my life journey things aren't perfect. I deal with some issues...still have bad days...still question...it's real life. But I have Hope in something more!
So, I'm still sad. Still questioning why this tragic event happened. Still worried about my brother. I'm hopeful though. Hopeful that something more will shine through all this sadness and speak to my brother and speak to Travis' family to give them Peace.
I know a lot of you who read my blog get where I'm coming from and you already have a relationship with God and you understand something more.
However, if you're reading this and you don't have the Hope. Just know that it's there, waiting for you when you're ready to seek it out. Don't give up the Hope of something more for your life. It's there. Really. I know.
Thanks for reading and continued prayers for my brother Aaron and Travis' family are very much appreciated.
There were a couple of well-known scriptures that really helped me in my early spiritual journey...they weren't well known to me at the time though.
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
12 but even in darkness I cannot hide from you. To you the night shines as bright as day.
Darkness and light are the same to you.
13 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
16 You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Well, to be fair, and I'm all about fairness (Kobe are you reading this?) I should give a little blog time to Kyler. Kyler is 3 1/2 and we are having so much fun with him now.
The tantrums are mostly over.
We can understand what he is saying most of the time.
Pee AND Poop lands in the potty most of the time. Yes, pee and poop are words thrown around frequently in our house. Yet another thing they don't tell you when you're expecting your first child...be prepared to become completely comfortable talking about pee and poop to total strangers AND be prepared to talk about it incessantly at home when the training phase is in motion.
He still won't sit through a movie at the theater without causing me much stress and infuriating all the people around us...but I know someday we'll be able to go see movies again.
He has always had the cutest personality and now that he can talk...well...he's winning the girls over...
Recently, we went grocery shopping and we were going down the canned vegetables aisle and we pass an attractive lady who was probably in her 40's. She was pushing her cart past us and Kyler says, "Hi There Widdle Wady". I don't think at first she knew he was talking to her or she wasn't sure what he said...but...when she looked up at him...he said it again. She proceeded to laugh and say how cute he was. So, I'm thinking "yeah, he is pretty cute" and go on with my veggie shopping.
Well, that wasn't the end of it...from then on...every woman we passed in the store he would wave and say, "Hi There Widdle Wady". The girls were coming out of the woodwork to say Hi to the boy when they saw this cute little guy waving at them and giving them a smile.
Finally, we make it to the checkout and he is at the end of the checkout line (by the bags) while I'm paying and I hear him yell, "Hi There Widdle Wady" and I look up and he is yelling across 3 checkout lines to an elderly lady in a wheelchair. As we passed her she wanted to know his name and said "You are just the cutest thing ever." I think he made her day...he made mine!
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Here are some pictures:
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
So much to write about and so little time...sigh...I'll fill you in on all the happenings soon. I've got so much to share with you...some photos of our front landscaping project, the progress I'm making in my creative writing class, the kids excitement about Halloween, my Simple Abundance re-awakening (thanks Aunt Amelia)...and some sad and heartbreaking news about my brothers room-mate! So, without even telling you what happened...I would so very much appreciate your prayers for my brother Aaron...I promise to fill you in soon when I have more time to write.
I haven't even had much time to visit all of your blogs and I MISS YOU! I'll be back soon.
Friday, October 2, 2009
There is much nesting going on in my home in the past couple of weeks. A refocus on our home instead of other things. An excuse of being too busy has been used for the past few years. Busy we are, but there is still time to take care of the home we love. Some things have been neglected and now need to be tended to.
Together a list was penned and progress has already been made on the marking off of things. Marked off things like 30 year old overgrown shrubs are now gone. New and younger looking plants are going in their well established place. Paint will soon be scraped, old and warped floors replaced, needle-crafts that decorate our home will be picked up again, things we don’t need given to those who do.
Spring and Fall are always nesting times for me.
Fall...the time to tidy up our home and make it cozy and comfortable for the coming holiday celebrations and winters snuggle in.
Spring...the time to open up, air out and pare down for the simpler summer days ahead.
As my spring and summer cleaning was deep this year, the fall work will be too.
Crossing things off the list feels good. Like Progress.